A new word for beautiful…


I woke up in Fargo, ND this morning. I’ve actually been looking forward to this day for a long time. Hahah I know right?? I promised myself a full day off in a hotel once I got to Fargo. Fargo. I stayed in bed until about noon today. Then it was time to get up and do all the shit my “day off” required me to do. Upload photos, send emails, edit images, back up video… exhausting. Drinking coffee, reading magazines, watching Game of Thrones, and masturbating sounds like a better “day off” but the show must go on. I’m pretty tired and I’m embarking on the area of the country where I don’t know many people, and I have never been to. I woke up feeling lonely and low. Then I check my phone. I had a text from my Indianapolis model checking up on me, then I heard from my Montana model, then my DC model… I was filled with love and realized that I have been meeting amazing people and making lasting connections, all over the country.

I have felt strange lately, not bad, but different. I feel young and old for my age at the same time. I see people my age marrying, having kids, buying houses, and I’m… well….living in a van. But that’s okay. I think of every new line on my face as the price I’m paying for achieving my dream and painting in the sun everyday 🙂 I don’t really get hit on like I did when I was a young cute thang, but there has been a word I have been called a lot lately…. and I think its a fair trade for hot, or beautiful. Inspiration.  People have been saying that my journey is Inspirational or Inspiring them to want to go for their dreams. If nothing else comes out of this, I’m so glad it is inspiring others to go for what they’re truly passionate about. I’ll take that.


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